a lonely holiday

been away 4 quite sometime..not much to be told n shared since rite now i'm spending a lonely holiday at home.. its not dat im not happy with my beloved family but it seems like there is an empty hole in my heart n my brain..n make my holiday feel meaningless even i really hope to b away from my work.. this some time should help me to make better decision for my future..my life.. seeing my best buddies furthering their studies + continuing our old dreams really made me thrill + excited + motivated + "happy 4 them feeling", but not forgotten jealous! i really know dat i'm fully ready to continue learning but i have too much commitment dat cant be put aside.. my job and da distance keep da dream fade away.. please God.. help me dis tyme..